Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Here's Your Sign.....

Nope...I didn't have any smelly people on the bus ask me what my sign is. Although when I looked at them, I envisioned special signs around each of there necks....

* girl with wet hair, wearing too much Amber Romance - "Wannabe Future Herbal Essence Star"
*smelly old man going home to his wife - "Wife Repellent"
*unbathed kids - "Future Germaphobic"

However, there are other signs...both visible and invisible. And lets not forget the visible ones that are selectively invisible, apparently.

Case in point: The Orange Line has its own road. For buses only! No traffic, no idiots on the road to deal with. (just idiots on the bus)

At least thats how it should be.

On my way home there was a police car parked in the bus lane at one of the stops. Not a normal occurrence (when police visit the stops, they park somewhere else).

hmm...whats that ahead of the police car? A car! A regular everyday street car.

Getting a ticket.

Because he didn't see the HUGE ass sign?

What part of DO NOT ENTER did he not understand?

Here's Your Sign!

What about invisible signs. Or...actions....expressions? Mixed signals?

The little walking person is going in the same direction as the arrow.

It says not to walk, but to use the crosswalk. Should I......skip?

Then there's the man in the wheelchair, dressed in black leather pants, black vans, tatoos. Kinda looked like a washed up hair band member (drummer would be my guess since he played the air-drums the whole time). Did I mention that he was maybe in his 60's? and had straw like black died hair? It seemed that....his legs worked fine. He zooomed (literally zoomed, almost knocking the old lady down in front of him) his wheelchair into place and then proceeded to use his legs to brace himself from rolling forward at each stop. He even stood up once. I dunno about you, but that was a little bit confusing.

What about the guy that frowns at you the whole time he's staring at your breast? Guess he's not real happy about what he's looking at. (Then STOP looking!!)

Be careful about that seemingly polite man who offers you his seat. Especially when he stands right in front of you. Where do you look??? (Can't he go stand in front of a blind man or something?)

I no longer try to have conversations with other people on the bus. (first of all, you discover that they have bad breath the minute they open their mouth) Ever since I talked to a very nice older woman who looked at me and gave me the sweetest smile, nodding her head as I talked. Come to find out...she didn't understand a bit of english. Photobucket

Maybe now I know who to tell my deepest secrets too.

1 comment:

  1. LOL funny stuff! Ok especially the crosswalk sign....it's hysterical!